News for January 2010
Author's Note
I'm always a little sad to see the hustle and bustle of the holidays come to an end. The warmth of the fireplace, the smell of the tree and the lure of the holiday foods are intoxicating. It seems so long until the next respite from our busy work schedules. If you are like me, you often forget to give yourself some time to just be instead of a constant, endless list of doings & tasks. As you put together your goal list for 2010, I urge you to remember to create goals for yourself which include these important categories: personal goals, health goals, recreational, and spiritual/nature goals. We always seem to remember the financial and career goals, but we tend to forget those that are a little more personal. To that end I've dedicated this month's issue to the creation of your goals for 2010 (found after the following note about my visit to England to meet author Frank Stanford and the Friends of Sussexdown Nursing Home).
Until next month......Lin
Meeting Author Frank Stanford & Touring Sussexdown Nursing Home
What a wonderful visit we had with author Frank Stanford. To be able to see his Garden Tribute to World War II veterans firsthand was something I'd looked forward to ever since I came to know Frank. Although the weather was cold and threatening rain, he hung all of his flags in honor of our visit -- he knew how much that would mean to me, and he was right. Posing with Jon (left) and I (right) are Frank and Dawn. 
Every inch of the walls inside Frank and Dawn's home displays WWII memorabilia they have collected over the years. With over 2000 visitors to their home to see their collection, share stories and learn about the brave men and women of that era, it is a visit you will never forget.
Our next stop was to tour the Sussexdown Nursing Home and meet the Friends of Sussexdown, a delightful volunteer group who are constantly busy conjuring up concerts and other events to keep the residents active. I must say I have never seen such an impressive nursing home. The staff is friendly and the residents are out of their rooms taking part in some activity or visiting with other residents. Created to host RAF veterans in their later years, Sussexdown has its own chapel, beautifully manicured grounds, a special dementia ward, and even its own pub! 
They proudly display several models of the WWII planes that Frank made. 
Frank's model of the Lancaster is shown here with (from the left) Pauline Davis, Sally Williams, me, and Judith Robson. Pauline, Sally and Judith are very active Friends of Sussexdown. Proceeds from Frank Stanford's book, My Garden Tribute, are donated to the Friends of Sussexdown. If you would like to make a donation, please click here. You can purchase the book or just make a donation. You can also mail donations to us at this address:
Friends of Sussexdown
c/o Amethyst Moon Publishing
P.O. Box 87885
Tucson, AZ 85754
Setting Goals / Achieving Dreams
Step 1: Identify
Make a list of all the things you want to do or accomplish. Don't worry about the time frame to achieve these goals or the order in which you list them. Just make a list. When you have written down all that you can think of, put the list some place where you get to it easily. Over the next few days, when you think of something you want to add, pull out the list and write it down. It is your Goal List, so add or subtract from it as you wish. However, pay attention to your reason for adding or removing an item. Do not put anything on the list or remove things from it because you are concerned about what someone might think. These are your goals. They need to be honest and real for this process to work.
Step 2: The Sorting
First you need to sort your list into Short Term Goals and Long Term Goals. Place items in the Short Term Goal List if they are to be accomplished within the next 5 years. All other goals will go on the Long Term Goals List. For now, set aside the Long Term Goal List and focus on your short-term goals, i.e., those that you want to accomplish in 5 years or less. Each goal on your Short Term Goals List needs to be categorized. Sort your short-term goals into one of these 7 categories, using the guidelines listed:
1. Career / School -- This category includes goals you've listed that address how you want to approach your current job or education, any changes you will be making or changes you would like to make.
2. Financial -- Financial goals can be relative to the money you currently make, the money you want to have and/or how you manage your money. They can include goals about paying off debts or planning for things you want to buy.
3. Health -- Health goals address things like diet and exercise (if they are for health reasons), meditation, setting an appointment for a physical, or getting off medication.
4. Relationships -- This category should address your friends, family, acquaintances, and co-workers. They might include things like spending more time with someone or repairing a relationship.
5. Personal -- Use this category for items that are related to hobbies or are self-improvement in nature.
6. Recreational -- Recreational goals address those things you do for fun, play, rest, or recuperation. They can also include goals that relate to keeping the mind active.
7. Spiritual / Natural -- This category is for goals that have to do with your connection to the divine or nature.
It's best not to have more than 5 goals per category on your Short Term List and 3 goals in each category on your Long Term List. Although there are exceptions, having too many goals can drain you or dilute your focus. Make sure every category has at least one goal.
Step 3: Prioritizing
It is a good idea to prioritize your goals within each category. For instance, let's say my goals in the Financial category are: pay off my car loan, save money for a trip to Venice and put money away for my daughter's birthday present. Now let's say I receive a tax refund of $1000.00. If I have prioritized my financial goals, then I know exactly where to use this money. Prioritize your own goals listing the highest priority first. Once you have completed Steps 2 & 3 for your Short Term Goal List, do the same processes (sorting & prioritizing) for your Long Term Goal List.
Step 4: Intending
Your goals should be written in past tense, i.e., as if they have already occurred, or in present tense, i.e., as if they are true in this moment. It sounds odd, but it is important to see your goals as something you've already accomplished or are already experiencing. To that end, rephrase each of your goals using past tense words like, "I have" or using verbs ending in "-ed", or present tense words like, "I am" or using verbs ending in "-ing". In addition, you need to remove limiting words and replace them with non-limiting words. Limiting words are those that give absolute limits, like, "I will make $20 an hour in my job", or use lack-of-faith words like "want" or "need", like "I want to make $20 an hour in my job". What if you were offered $50 and hour? Would you turn that down? The goal is non-limiting if it is stated like this, "I am making at least $20 an hour in my job." Here are some other examples: An original personal goal states: "I will exercise 3 times a week." The goal rewritten without the limiter "3" and phrased in present tense: "I am exercising at least 3 times a week."
An original relationship goal states: "I want to repair my relationship with my mother so we no longer fight every time we are together." The goal without the limiter "want" and phrased in past tense: "I have a great relationship with my mother; we seldom, if ever, fight."
Step 5: Believing
It is now time to add dates to your goal list. Take the prioritized list of your Short Term Goals and add a target date to specify when you will accomplish each goal. Remember that it is important to set realistic goals, reasonable dates and hold the belief in yourself that you will accomplish your goals and dreams. I like to pick one of my goals and make it a kind of "mantra" or catchphrase in order to help me remember what I am accomplishing. This one-sentence reminder will keep me focused. If, for example, you have a goal to pay off your credit card debt, your reminder might be, "I am debt free." Keeping this in mind when financial decisions need to be made, such as what to do with any extra income (pay down your debt) or whether or not to purchase something on credit (no!!), can help you achieve your goal. In other words, if you act truly debt free then your decisions about money change; you don't spend money you don't have, and you work to pay off debt. Believing in your goal is key.
Step 6: Achieving
Now that your goals have been established and prioritized, you will need to refer to your Goal List occasionally in order to check your progress and remind yourself of what you are working to achieve. When you have achieved most of the goals in a category, you may want to add new ones. Try to review and update your goals (if necessary) at least once a year. To accomplish your goals and achieve the life you want, it is helpful to know where you are headed!!